Motherhood [Paperback] Heti, Sheila

A very thought provoking and insightful book about whether or not one should have a child.I have been struggling with that question for almost a year now and reading this book made me feel less alone. We are conventionally taught that as women we ought to be mothers. But shouldn’t that be a choice? A choice and a decision that comes from deep within oneself. We struggle to let our thoughts known to others because of the fear of being judged and ridiculed. Motherhood is placed on such a high pedestal that not wanting to be a mother is filled with ridicule, shame and questions from everyone.I love the writing, and I love and applaud the author for being able to put those inner workings in writing.Thank you so much for writing this book!

This book follows the thoughtful protagonist through the life-changing decision of whether or not to have a child. I have folded over so many pages, especially in the first 80 pages, which emphasise the fact that society typically asks, ‘when are we having a baby?’ but ‘will I have a baby?’ and ‘do I want one?’ should be more prevalent discussions. It’s interestingly written and sums up a lot of my worries and opinions thoughtfully.I have folded over so many pages in this novel but the argument that stuck with me the most was the issue on asking women or expecting women to have something else planned if not a baby. And that something must be great. If you don’t have something great enough to do instead then you must be a mother. Another thought that really stuck with me was the historical discussion about the fact that men were ends in themselves and women were daughters to try to get rid of. This might be why we feel so urgent in having children and men don’t but it’s okay now, as a woman, you can be an end in yourself. Men do things but women do great things too so you can be an end in yourself rather than a passage for another man. It’s just a bit mind blowing and brilliant in every way. Add it to your compulsory reading list!

As someone who has chosen not to have children I bought this book with some intrigue.Parts of it sung out to me: there are some wonderfully written lines.However I must confess to finding some of it rather self-indulgent, overly flowery and a bit...whingy.I enjoyed it overall and am glad to have read it. But it spoke more about the author's personal woes than anything else.

Save your money. Self indulgent, self obsessed, middle-class person writes hundreds of pages of diary entries about herself and her boyfriend and calls it a novel. Tedious af.

I was interested to read this book. The pros and cons of having kids is something that should be discussed a lot more. Too often it’s just seen as what women must do in our society and how life is never the same again is not given enough thought.However, I have struggled to get through the book. I couldn’t stand the stream of consciousness writing and the way she asks questions and flips a coin. I found myself skipping over these parts. An essay in a newspaper or magazine would have been a better medium for this topic.

Motherhood is a lyrical mediation on whether or not to become a mother - a deeply personal decision that society routinely puts its two cents in. The narrator (who may or may not be Heti?) struggles with her own uncertainty about motherhood in the face of society's relentless commentary, and wrestles with the relationship between (non-)motherhood and writing. Though some may criticize the book for navel-gazing, I think that feature of the book is an honest reflection of the ambivalence many contemporary women feel towards motherhood.